Taking the absolute piss out of people wearing horrendous items of clothing on an aeroplane is fun – but it dawned on me that I didn’t really touch on what you SHOULD have on you. I thought I would assist with my Travel Essentials…
1 – Reading Material. I always spare a couple minutes of sympathy for my fellow travel-buddies when they get on a plane with nothing to read. Inside their mind is a constant battle of “are we bored enough to read the airline mag yet?” and “this alone time is good to reflect on my journey ahead”. When I travel on a plane/train/donkey, my reading pile be like…
2 – Sleeping Eye-Thingy. The airline ones are rank – keep your eye-sleeper-thingy game strong. Does anyone know what these things are called? *let a girl know in the comments. tenks.
But remember, no matter which one you buy… it will never be as sexual as mine from 1st For Women. So stop trying.
3 – Comfy Shoes. Flip flop comes from the phrase – “don’t let your feet touch the floor of a backpackers bathroom.” At one time or another… you will need your flippy-flops. Tip – tie them to your backpack when they aren’t on your feet. Makes you look like a legit travel/hippie/soul-searcher.
4 – Neck Pillow… preferably in the shape of a squirrel. Will. Change. Your. Life. Also, it will prevent an awkward situation… you know the one where you wake up on someone else’s shoulder. Drooling. On them. However, if Jared Leto sits next to you – throw the dang pillow away. Eat it if you have to.
5 – Bail Money. There will be a time when you need that extra hands-on cash. Use only in the case of an Emergency. By emergency I mean – I’m super wasted and need to get a taxi ASAP and I can’t walk to a cash point. I’m that drunk.
6 – Refresh Kit. You are going to smell real bad at some point in your trip. Don’t be a hippie and refuse sanitation aid. Lip balm. Dry shampoo. Face wipes. Sanitizer. Lotion. Deodorant.
7 – Passport. Duh. This is more a reminder to check your EXPIRY DATE. Some countries don’t grant you a landing visa if your passport has less than 6 months remaining. Be clever and CHECK. My sister had to renew her passport in Bangkok. She still cries about it.
So yeah, as always, you are WELCOME!!!