I’ve written about something similar in my post about ‘My Thoughts on the Dick Pic’ and I got a few questionable replies to that post. You see; there’s this idea that us females deserve some of the shit we receive. That, somehow, we are asking for the shit we receive. I’m also writing this from the perspective of females being sent inappropriate things from males. I haven’t encountered a problem with female on female so I can’t comment on that. I’m sure my views on it would remain the same and I would stand up for myself just the same.
Here’s how I feel about online harassment and the idea of ‘what do you expect?’…
I got some responses to the Dick Pic post that were along the lines of – “You’re online and you openly post pictures of yourself – what do you expect?” So, I had a think on that and put things into perspective, you know, for the people at the back who don’t hear too well.
If I’m walking (openly) outside my house and I encounter a gentleman, am I asking for it if he whips his dick out and shows it to me? Was I asking for it because (how dare I) walk freely outside my house? If I’m walking to work and a man approaches me and says: “Hey sexy, where do you live? I want to meet up with you?” – Should I just be OK with that and not react to it? Not stand up for myself?
Why are we even humouring online harassment?
You’re online – you’re asking for it.
You’re in a bikini online – you’re asking for it.
You’re wearing a short skirt – you’re asking for it.
You’re a woman – you’re asking for it.
I fucking refuse that response. Why is it our fault that men are not able to control their urges? Why must we be degraded for the sake of their egos?
It’s also a gateway; if we allow girls to think that because they wear a dress in their Instagram pictures, they somehow have to face the backlash they experience. What message is that sending them? That they should keep quiet when they feel uncomfortable?
They aren’t allowed to complain about it; I mean, they asked for it – right? Jennifer Lawrence said it perfectly:
“I’m still learning that I don’t have to smile when a man makes me feel uncomfortable.”
We should never just sit back and smile. Why should we ‘take it’? Who does that help? The creep sending inappropriate messages – does it help them? Why are we helping them?
Why on earth would we choose to help them over helping ourselves?
I refuse this whole idea of online harassment being deserved because of the fact that a woman chooses to be online. Men need to understand that what they’re doing is wrong and they need to do better. Unless the caption says, “Please send me dick pics and extremely sexual messages.” – practice self-control.
No, ladies, you don’t deserve any form of online harassment and you don’t have to put up with it. Block them, report them – make some noise! We should not be silenced on this issue.
Stay safe on the Internet and make sure you’re taking the necessary steps to keep your personal information private.